Recently, I met a woman engaged in a verbal ‘fight
to finish’ with a road-side onion dealer over prices. The ‘akshon’ spirit in me was aroused and I decided to go
straight to PMB to ask him ‘whats-gwan’; after all, onions are
not imported and the price is not subject this our queer economic strategy of regulated deregulation. I went
with Ibom Air. One of the things we have not settled alright in Nigeria is
whether Government should be involved in business or not. And so, while the
central and some subsidiary governments are selling their criminally mismanaged businesses (or rather dashing them
to their cronies), others are building new ones. Anyway, the beautiful hostess
announced that due to Coro, they would not serve any refreshments but that we
would all receive bags of goodies while we exited. Its long I
patronized any of our airlines( air travel is for big-men a class
to which I do not belong) and so, I expected an Ibom-made
hamper. As we landed at Abuja, the
center of Unity, which is being managed by select people from a select part of
our country, and where the indigenes (whom I thought were compensated and resettled
then, have suddenly became so visible), we were given a beautified paper-bag
containing a miserable piece of cake and
fruit-juice, the size of which would not be enough for a 3 month old.
The bottle of water was so small that I kept it as a memento. Funny enough, the paper-bag obviously cost
more than the contents.
Anyway, the author
and finisher of fake news and hate speech used some ‘amotekun’
means to know in advance that I had come on an End-SARS mission
and as such, I was not even allowed to cross the city-gate. My journey was
aborted and I ended at Katampe, in the fringes of the city. When I could not
devise another strategy for getting to the rock, including ‘ikwu-ikili’
(flying invisibly, witch-like!), I decided to get to my village to ask from ‘amaehulu’
why they were able to decipher my
motives from afar and why the ‘ikwu-ikili’
failed. I decided to go through Owerri and boarded Dana-Air. That was when I appreciated the generosity of
Ibom Air. Dana-Air used the same Coro and the need to minimize contacts as an
excuse to offer us nothing except
another miserable bottle of water, which they placed at our disposal before we
boarded the plane. ( Ibu, the Sienna driver that ferried me from
Igbo-Ukwu to Lagos and who charged less than 30% of the Dana fare placed a
carton of full-size bottle of water at our disposal of 5 of us). I asked the
air-hostess why they could not monetise the refreshments-since that would
guarantee zero contact and she got confused.
Since they had all our phone-numbers, they would have credited us with
N1000 worth of airtime in lieu of refreshments! It was as simple as that! I am
still trying to get across to Nigerian Civil Aviation Authority and the
Nigerian Consumer Protection Council over the matter. Any way, we landed at
Owerri Airport and on my way out of the airport, I saw it: A large billboard of
the Supreme-Court Governor, with the shouting inscription: ‘HOPISM;
Where government meets the people’. It also had a 3R subtitle: Recovery, Rehabilitation and Reconstruction.! I saw many of such before I left Owerri that
day. Ha! ‘Hopism’? And then, I remembered ‘Iberiberism’! Who did this to my brethren in Imo State? It is too early to surmise if this is from
frying pan to raw fire!
Rochas did not set out to
espouse Iberibesism as his
political philosophy but he somehow got around
polularising the term to the extent that it stuck. Iberiberism simply means
first-class foolishness ( the type they call compound-fool)
and according to Chidiebere Iwuoha, the term described those Rochas ‘regarded
as foolish people in their ways of life or those doing things that were not in
tandem with what he was doing’ like those opposing the candidacy of Nwosu, his
in-law or those in APC who thwarted some of his political shenanigans (Bear
with me; I am not used to big words but this one just smuggled itself in and
the Customs officer around looked the other way!)
When I thought about
Rochas and his days at Imo State, I believed that he behaved ‘iberiberistically’,
in some ways, the most visible of which was stealing ‘opendentially’
by converting Imo State into one huge family business run by Rochas and Wife and Children and siblings and
in-laws et al. For instance, his wife ‘controlled over four ministries’ (
As revealed by Rochas himself in
December 2016); his in-law, Uche Nwosu was the operational Deputy Governor
before he became the gubernatorial candidate. The sister, Ogechi was Chief of Staff in charge of Domestic Affairs as well as being in charge of
Christmas Decoration Project before being the first Commissioner for Happiness
and Couple Fulfillment in Nigeria, nay, Africa.
In his practice of Iberiberistic
‘familiocracy’ he learnt from Eduardo Santos( who named his
daughter as head of Sonnagol, the State Oil Co), Trump (who made his
son-in-law, Kushner as his senior adviser) Nguema of Equatorial Guinea( whose
son was the VP and Minister of Finance), Museveni of Uganda( who promoted and
appointed his son his special adviser), the 86 year old Jugnauth of Mauritius
who suddenly realized that ‘the time has
come for the country to have a young leadership that represents the future’ and
the only qualified person was his son, Pravind). Other acts of Iberiberism
ascribed to him included construction of 27 gigantic general hospitals in 27
LGAs, none of which was completed, equipped or staffed, demolition of markets,
erection of statutes including that of the multi-wived Zuma,
several substandard projects and the failure to fulfill several of his
promises. He also ‘prioritized the construction of 27
stadia—all at once—when the main stadium in Owerri was in shambles.
Furthermore, ‘he ran an opaque government that serviced his ego more than it
touched the common man. It is true he built many roads and structures. But he
took his shallowness into everything he touched. The roads were poorly done;
some of his bridges had no engineering designs. When he did a tunnel,it became
a swimming pool for cars’( No be me talk-am!)
And now to Hopism. The articulate taxi driver that ferried me through ‘what was a road’ from Owerri to Orluto Akokwa,( Rochas doormouth) enroute IgboUkwu told me that the only people who had benefited from Hopism were those who produced billboards and banners; and I saw enough to agree with him. Another aspect of Hopism that I observed first-hand was the announcement by the Commissioner for Works on radio (27/11/20)that the Owerri-Orlu and Owerri Okigwe roads would be awarded to ‘competent foreign contractors’. In other words, only foreign contractors are competent. He told me that the Rochas white-elephant hospital had been demolished and converted into something else (rather than completion and commissioning). He also told me that the government had passed a law that enables the Governor to arrest and detain any resident of the state for as long as he wished. He said it was a reaction to his appellation as a Supreme-Court Governor as well as other acts of defiance against him by Imolites. I didn’t believe this one but I researched and behold, it is true: the Imo State Administration of Criminal Bill No 2 of 2020. Sections 484 & 485 of the law provides that where any person is ordered to be detained during the governor’s pleasure, he shall notwithstanding anything contained in any other written law, be liable to be detained in such place and under such conditions as the governor may direct and that such may at any time be discharged by the governor on license which said license may be in such form and in such conditions as the governor may direct under section, a license that may, at any time be revoked or varied by the governor and where license has been revoked, the person to whom the person the license relates shall proceed to such place as the governor may direct and if he fails to do so, may be arrested without warrant and taken to such place.”
In a democracy! Even Trump did not go as far as
this. However, Barr Adegoruwa has assured
me that the law does not concern me and I am yet to ascertain from my friend,
UJ Nkamuke, a fiery activist, where he when this abominable law was passed!
One Imoliti says it all: ‘One charlatan goes another charlatan
comes. Poor Imo’
I seize this opportunity to wish Catholics,
all over the globe, a happy New Year. Our new year started with Advent on 30/11/20.
I also wish to congratulate my ‘Bros’, Abraham
Ogbodo on the long and eventful life of his father, Pa Amos Orovwomoriemu
Ogbodo Idiabiago (I hope I got it write), who
lived for 106 years ( yes; one hundred and six) and was buried two weeks
ago (21/11/20).
- Ik Muo, Department of Business Sdministration, OOU, Ago-Iwoye. 08033026627
The governor is a good learner as he has tutors scattered all over Africa and beyond.
ReplyDeleteHappy new year sir!
Very unfortunate with the government and Ndi Imo State,that it's in their character of waisting enormity of resources in billboards and banners erection.
ReplyDeleteThe previous governments, from Achike Udenwa to the present SC Gov (aka Foreign Exchange),it's the same way and manner of snapping 4 corners of a classroom building project and showcasing to the whole world as achievements.