The roaming and roaring lion the lion no longer roars!
At their peak, lions roar, rule, chase other animals, catch devour, gulp and leave the crumbs for hyenas. But age comes fast. The old lion cannot hunt, kill, or defend itself; it roams and roars until it runs out of luck. It will be cornered by hyenas, nibbled at and eaten alive by them. They wont even let it die before it is dismembered. Life is short; power is ephemeral… everyone who lives long will become vulnerable at some point. Therefore let us be humble.. and most importantly never forget that we will leave the stage one day, Vaigai Selvan(Endless Knowledge)
I don’t know how it came to become that one of my earliest interventions in 2023 is on Wike, the weird Governor of Rivers State, the original bridge-builder(has built the highest number of bridges and flyovers in the state, more than all previous governors put together and more than any Governor in Nigeria); a lawyer who doesn’t mind bending the law, somebody who craves public adulation and whose Kabyesiasation and canonization is now complete, as he has cowed everybody. He has also joined Nigerian Pentecostals in the privatisation of God(you now have The God of Wike). He has also became a recent, the self-appointed Chief of Staff to God who decrees authoritatively those whom God would not give power ( the wicked and the treacherous and those threatening to deal with him)as well as how God, who is ordinarily forgiving and compassionate had given him power to crush his enemies. That is despite the fact that he has declared that he is not a born-again Christian and would rather blow heads off than turn the other cheek! On 26/1/23, he declared they said they will deal with me when they win. You can’t win. You’ve not won, you are threatening to deal with some people. Will God allow you? All of them planning and saying they will deal with us, they’ve not been born. I dare them, let them try it. He did not say they may not win; he said they cant win; he is so sure and only the Chief of Staff to God can be this sure!
While Peter Obi, the author and finisher of OBIcracy, is the most trending politician and figure in Nigeria, Wike is the most trending non-contestant in the Nigerian electoral firmament. And he does everything to maintain that ranking by seeking and holding attention, keeping his friends and foes on edge. Only a person with high Wikeestic quotient can appoint fresh 14,000, 28000, 50000, 100000 and 200000 advisers and assistants within a few days in this distressed Nigerian environment, which makes you wonder about the budgetary system he operates in Rivers State It also affirms the total deification of a fellow who has been a government pikin since he finished his education. He has promised to make public his favoured presidential candidate soon for 1001 times and that ‘soon’ has lasted at least 3 months. Even 30 days to the election, the soon has not matured! The other day, a traditional ruler overcame the dread of Wike and told him pointedly: this thing is taking long; tell us the person; just as Thomas asked Jesus: tell us where you are going (John, 14:5). And this has become a selling tool for media houses, especially the online ones, which will always report: Wike speaks on preferred candidate; G5 makes a crucial decision…!Of course, what do you expect of a fellow who openly declared that he is only happy when he makes people( especially those who don’t want to see him) unhappy, worry-full and suffer higher high BP? Or that his duty is to make people sweat, blow out their faces, knock them out in round 1 rather than fighting for the whole 12 rounds. And he was regaling his listeners with his fighting prowess at a thanks-giving service inside a church!
But those who think that this ‘thing’ just started today are either the proverbial ‘strangers in Jerusalem’( Luke, 24:18) or they have failed to scan the mass-media environment. He exhibited the highest level of Wikeism during the Coro lock down and lock up and that was when the Tony Afejuku crowned him not just an Emperor, but the Emperor-General( Guardian,22/5/20). The social media conscripted into the army where without going through the ranks, they decorated him as Brigadier- General N.O Wike, Commanding Officer, 101 Waterside Brigade, Special Waterside Forces. That was when he vested himself with all the powers on, above and under the earth; made the laws via executive orders( legislature); apprehended the offenders, terrrorised them verbally before prosecuted them and judged them all in one( judiciary) and executed the punishment, as when he demolished hotels for violating the protocols ( executive). Indeed, he has lived out the Napoleonic declaration of L'etat ces’t moi Those old enough will also remember the days of attempted coup in PH and the war between Abuja and PH and how he rubbished one HRH through a verbal bomb, calling him a small boy at a public function in PH the other day. It will also be recalled how he rescued Joi Nunie, a former NDDC boss and another Judge from the gestapo-style abduction by the police and the DSS, stating that this level of impunity cannot flourish under my watch. But as it has turned out, it appears that impunity is bad when perpetrated by others and adorable when it is Wikeria!
The current two-fighting theatricals of Wike started when he invested in the cash-and-carry Dollar-Denominated PDP primaries, lost out in what some prayer warriors term an almost-there fashion and turned himself into a self-appointed defender of the South and arrowhead of the war against inequity. Of course, we know that Wike is not the best qualified to fight against the iniquity and inequity of the PDP. In terms of equity and awa-lokan, the PDP presidential ticket should not just go to the South but to the South-East. However, some invisible hands ensured that the ticket was ‘thrown open’ . Some people( no be me) opined that it was Wike who powered those powerful invisible hands. Then in total disregard to equity and good conscience, he contested and then lost. That was when he started his roforofo fight against Ayu, and Atiku and by extension, the Federal PDP. And he fights dirty, frontally and on all fronts. But there are some harmless questions for him: would he have been championing equity if he had won, or if Atiku had appointed him as his running-mate? In any case, he was even the one who elbowed out the former PDP chair from his state and he succeeded Amaechi, who is his brother, from the same zone!
The Atikulated Campaign Office was sealed. That was after he signed an order against citing campaign offices in residential areas (22/10/22) and probably that office would have been situated there before then. The Certificate of Occupancy granted to Senator Lee Maeba, a key Atikulator in Rivers State, was revoked by Wike who granted the CofO about 6 months previously!. He also directed that all the parties, and apparently, particularly, the PDP, should obtain monetised permit before rallies, asking them to come and beat me if you can…dare us and we will tell you that we are in charge. And yet he waived the executive order21 and allowed Atiku the free use of the stadium for campaign but followed it up with a warning to Sekibo, the PDP helmsman not to trespass into the stadium before the approved time…Dare it again, I will cancel it( the approval). Heaven will not fall. In fact, if heaven falls now, we will be happy that it was in our time heaven came down”. And immediately thereafter he bellowed that the battle line has been drawn with Ayu after the sack of the Ekit PDP executives. Any time he opens his mouth, it is about wars and threats of wars,( Matthew24:6) intimidation, warnings, fire and brimstones, dare us et al.
At times, the war gets apparently off-tangent and confusing. He got the State Assembly, which is in his pocket( as with other governors) to strip Omehia of all gubernatorial privileges,( including a refund of entitlements of N600m within a week) . I think Omehia became or was trying to become Atikulated. In a surprise move, he dropped all charges against his major local frenemy ,Amaechi and then as we were trying to figure out whatsgwan, he filed fresh charges against him and Cole. And he does all this on behalf of ‘my people’ of Rivers State,, an entity that is now the same thing and ten pence( synonymous) with Wike. He had sacked a commissioner that was presiding over a function and the other day, threatened to sack the Commissioner for Works if a certain contractor did not report to work within 24 hours. Of course the commissioner got the message because no governor has sacked or suspended his commissioners as Wike has done.
The undisputed or self-appointed leader of G5 now spends his last days in office giving awards to his fellow rebels, making and showcasing different asoebi’s, supporting their various activities and everything but not supporting the PDP national agenda. He also promised to support Obi totally if he came to campaign in Rivers, a promise which he kept 101% but went on to make the same promise to Kwankwaso of NNPP, endorsed Sanwo-Olu of APC for Lagos after donating N300m to wives of LASG officials, donated 23 busses to Benue PDP and looks the other way as his preferred candidate cobrands himself with Obi! He has also turned Rivers State into a political tourist destination; visited by an odd assortment of friends and foes. The latest as I write is group of Chief Obasenjo, Fayemi et al. The Nigeria Bureau of Statistics should please measure the contribution of political tourism in the economy of the state in the past one year!
Hosting OBJ & Fayemi, Fubara Cobranding with Obi evidence of OBIfication?
At times, I pity his co-travellers. Makinde is contesting for governorship under the PDP, just as Ortom, Ikpeazu and Ugwuanyi are seeking for admission into our national Old Peoples Home( Senate),under the same PDP. Furthermore, Ugwuanyi has serious security challenges at home( Ehamufu massacres) and people wonder openly why he is following Wike around. rather than squarely facing the existential challenge. VOI(Okezie), is owing some categories of doctors between 13-24 month’s salary, and owes the Academic Staff of Abia College of Education 27months salary arrears and promotion benefits. Even the road to his village is in disrepair and yet he is still dancing around with Wike, who commissions projects everyday. How can these one be contesting on the platform of a party they are openly castigating? As our people say, a the rat jumps into the river with the lizard, will soon realise that while the lizard’s skin dries up immediately, the rats hairy body will remain wet for a long while. The sudden death of the ebullient PDP Candidate( Prof Ikonne) has complicated matters for Okeazu. The flag-off of the campaign was done without the PDP National structure. In fact, Wike played the role reserved for the chairman at the occasion. Now, he needs the cooperation of the Chairman to conduct another primaries (this may be called secondaries) to replace the late candidate. But Wike has nothing to lose; his interest is just to protect his sphere of influence and safeguard his enormous wealth.
Wike has at times deployed his strong-head tendencies to apparently good and populist causes. He had prevented the police/DSS from arresting or abducting Joi Nunei, at unholy hours of the day just as he rescued a High Court Judge @ 35 forces avenue, from the same forces under the same circumstances. He also gallantly fought some genuine and fake, known and unknown soldiers, with fake guns and APCs during the 2019 elections.
Wike is imperious, erratic, impetuous, compulsive, verbally aggressive, unpredictable, overbearing and volatile. He suffers from high verbal acidity index and unparalleled executive rascality. His word is law and he does not suffer fools gladly. He is feared by friends and foes alike and hell has no furry like an angry Wike. Those interested in the study of narcissism cannot find a better case-study. But he appears to forget that power is transient. In the next few weeks, his powers will evaporate and he will be like other ex-this, ex-that and before long he will be forgotten. Where is Amaechi who was once the lion of PH? Wike is not the first to lead political rebellion in Nigeria and he will not be last. In recent times, we have had the nPDP and rAPC. Where are those temporary structures and their members today? How will he manage life after this lime light, outside this life and image he has created? Has he forgotten that however strong a lion is, one day, he will grow old, tired and live at the mercy of nature and other small animals. Has Wike thought about this scenario? Has he reflected on the morning-after, when others may serve him the same dish he is currently serving others; when he may have to shed midnight-tears, especially as he will surely fight with his successor?
Nobody is above tears!
Has he thought about tomorrow, which MUST come? Does he not know that one day, tomorrow will come, when he is bereft of the whole perquisites of office, immunity,; when he will no longer be able to tell his staff go there and he goes there come here and he comes here( Matthew, 8:9?
One thing that I like about him though is that he will not be idle in retirement as has acquired some post-retirement skills. One, he will go on with the Wike and his roforofo highlife band, releasing more hits in addition to the top-chat songs like as As edey pain dem, e dey sweet us; wike don come, tinyere ha ogbaghara( plant confusion in their midst), enye ndi ebea enye ndi ebea, pepper them and big man no be by size. However I am surprised that even though Wike is NOT an Igbo man, most of his songs are in Igbo. I also doubt if he will get patrons for his music, with his guttural voice after his retirement. Some other musicians may also sue him for copyright infringements. Another retirement business for his Wike is to Kiss his wife. He had declared that he would be less busy and that his wife would kiss him tire. This is good; at least for once, he will not be raising people’s BP
I only hope that as he gets freer, that the wife will also be free to make the kissing a full job. I don’t know why it is usual that as the man is slowing down, the woman is moving up; that is in addition to the omugwo business! Is this another version of casting down and lifting up? (Job, 22:29). He will also brush up his spiritual and prophetic capabilities. On 11/1/23, a woman who was in delayed labour gave birth after calling on the God of Wike three times. I would have doubted this but the testimony was given by a traditional ruler when Wike went on road commissioning at Ahoda. If the mere mention of his name could release the woman of her travails, just imagine what would happen if he attends a missionary school, undergoes 40days dry fasting and sets up Wike All-Peoples Ministries!
I don’t know how to conclude this Special Tribute to Wike apart from quipping: This wike sef!
I am very far away from Pitakwa but…I come in peace!
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